Been killing butterflies all week, should have climate change under control soon, grateful weathermen should send gratuities directly to my email address.
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Fiscal Responsibility
Why do I have the feeling that when the government takes over my money, they will not do any better than me, at spending it wisely.
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Wishful thinking
Stupidity has a half-life, intelligence is contagious.
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Your carbon footprint
Can sometimes be hard to see through your jet wash, buying offsets are like pretending you are educated.
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We don’t fall up
We are all here, because we are not all there.
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Dial it back
You ask a $15 an hour guy to tune your rocket, when all he can understand is pointy end up.
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Penny for your thoughts
But when I put in my two cents, your thoughts aren’t worth that much, are they.
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Ban Tacos
The last time I ate at the local taco stand, I probably knocked two days off the life of the Earth. it was a beef taco too, them damn cows!
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Cancel the Moon
Even if werewolves are just lore, the moon causes many more problems. Crime spikes, extreme waves, longer days and probably causes climate change and heart attacks.
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The new reality
The dumbest thing a person can ever do, is assume you are not surrounded by stupid people.